Linda & Dave join baby race
In a blantant attempt to keep up with the Jones (or the Kingwills) Linda K. is pregnant. Names being considered are Kevin James if it's a boy, and Kevin James if it's a girl. Of course, I'm rooting for triplets, in which case they'll be named Kevin, Evan and Devin, then maybe I'll finally get my own cartoon show.
Tom & Mary call it quits
Tommy and Mary
I think that about sums it up. (except for that stuff about the baby carriage).
News, good & bad.
Lots of softball stuff.
First off, thanks to Jim we now have a sponsor. Yep, the good people at Murray's Tap & Grill (who are customers of Jim's) reimbursed me for the league fee (now if I reimburse the rest of you is another story). They're also having t-shirts made for each of us at $5 each.
For those of you who don't play on the team but just want to show up, Murray's features pool, darts, good food, and a juke box that doesn't have any Kenny Loggin's on it. especially that one goddam "Winnie the Pooh" song I hate.
In other "dog's" news; the season didn't start out so hot for us, we lost our first two games, 9 to 6, and 14 to 5 respectively. We held the first team through out the first game, we just couldn't get the hits we needed at the end. in the second game we were neck and neck with the other team up until the sixth inning, we were only down three runs at that point. But alas, innings 6 and 7 proved the turning point in the game, their bats came alive and ours didn't. In defense of our team it was very cold outside (47 degrees) and so dark you couldn't see the ball until it was right on top of you.
Game three however is a whole different ballgame. The "dog's" had their breakout game of the season, holding the opposition to 6 hits (nobody ever reaching third) and winning the game by "slaughter rule" with a final score of 10, zip. And that my friend has not happened since the mighty dogs of '57. God bless 'em.
Hollywood Bound
One of the latest trends in Hollywood is to take characters from the comics and turn them into movies, Batman, Casper and Judge Dread, are just three examples of this. So I thought, what the hell, I'm pretty much an expert on comics, why don't I whip up some concepts and see if I can't cash in on some of the action.
Ziggy, The Movie
Love is...The Movie
Nancy and Sluggo, The Movie Follow them as they travel cross country searching for Nancy's Aunt Fritzi who is hiding from her mobster boyfriend, whose drug money she has stolen. The blood and guts really start to fly when they all meet up in Los Angles. Directed by Quentin Tarantino.
Calvin and Hobbes, The Movie
Taken For Granted
Every day we go through life overlooking or ignoring many of the things that make our day to day existence easier or sometimes even pleasureable. These things are just simple items; so simple and seemingly insignificant that we just don't think much about them. Well I'm about to change all that. In this column I will hgihlight a simple everyday item that I think goes unappreciated and sing it's praises.
And I start with one of the simplest yet most sublime creations on this planet. The Oreo.
The Oreo sandwich cookie has not changed since it's creation by the Nabisco Co. in 1913. And why should it? The perfect balance of cream filling and chocolate cookie waffer make it an almost Zen-like experience to eat. What could be better then sitting down with an ice cold glass of milk and an Oreo cookie? Nothing. Is it any wonder that the Oreo is the best selling cookie in the world? I think not.
So whether you twist it apart, or eat it all at once, you must admit the Oreo is a little bit of Heaven of Earth. Mr. Nabisco; I salute you.
10 T.V. Shows I'd Watch
Land of the Giants
Zoom
The Time Tunnel
Night Stalker
The Mikey Bania Show
Alias Smith & Jones
Jonny Quest The Banana Splits
The Green Hornet
Playboy After Dark
Ode to Marisa Tomei
Marisa, Marisa
Spotlight On...
Vicky is one of 12 children, who are not children at all, but actually the result of an experiment in cloning, conducted in secret by the United States government during the 1950's and 60's.
The experiment was a smashing success. The J. "children" have all grown up to be normal, productive, people; living normal lives among the rest of us.
Vicky for instance attended Columbia College, earned her degree and has had many jobs in the field of video production. She was once even an assistant producer on a popular T.V. show.
Vicky enjoys volleyball and softball; she is one of the few founding members of the "Dogs" who are still playing with us.
Vicky is also an avid fan of the movies. We think this interest in films has something to do with her secret mission as a clone. We believe she is supposed to work her way into the film industry and subvert our minds with movies written by her and her masters. Then again, maybe we're completely off base on this one. Is Vicky one of many clones created to take over the world or is she just the product of parents with over active glands? Only time will tell.
Vicky's 10 Favorite Movies
The Terminator
(to the single life)
Sitting in a tree.
K.I.S.S.I.N.G.
First mes love,
Then comes marriage,
then comes Tommy with a baby carriage.
Robert DeNiro packs on the pounds as he and Martin Scorsese team up again to bring us another piece of of movie making genius. Ziggy, fed up with always being the fall guy, wanders the mean streets of New York exacting revenge on those he feels are responsible for the breakdown of civilization which he believes has caused all his rotten luck.
Drew Barrymore & Ethan Hawke are the cute little couple who try to find new and interesting ways of expressing their love for each other. Love is a hummer in an elevator?
Wynona Ryder and Christian Slater are the 90's version of the little girl with the fuzzy hair and ger stubble headed boyfriend.
MacCauly Caulkin is calvin, the little boy whose stuffed tiger comes to life when no one else is around. But in my script when the tiger becomes real, he kills the kid. Not a very long movie, but I think millions will flock to see that little 'Home Alone" brat finally get his.
If They Reran Them
how I long to kiss ya.
If you went away
do you know how much I'd miss ya?
Others talk bad about your Oscar
but you know I'd never dis ya.
Oh Marisa, my Marisa,
how I long to kiss ya.
Vicky J.
(In no particular order)
Victor, Victoria
The Philadelphia Story
Holiday
The Adventures of Robin Hood
Aliens
Lady Hawk
Oklahoma
The Mark of Zorro
Thieve